1. The Electric Ashtray Cleaner
Only in the ’70s would someone invent an electric device for cleaning another electric device. The Electric Ashtray Cleaner looked like a tiny vacuum meant to suck up ashes, cigarette butts, and stray matches. It promised to “freshen the room instantly,” though it mostly just whirred loudly while redistributing the smell of smoke. Some versions even had built-in air fresheners that released perfumed mist afterward.
Homeowners thought it was futuristic at the time, but it was really just overcomplicating something a dustpan could do. Still, in a decade when everyone smoked indoors, this little gadget felt like progress. It was marketed as a must-have for the modern living room, even though it broke down often and needed constant cleaning itself. It’s now a forgotten relic of a smoky, avocado-green era.
2. The Shampoo Vacuum
Before Dyson and Roomba, there was the Shampoo Vacuum, a bizarre cross between a carpet cleaner and a hairdryer. It promised to wash and dry your carpets in one pass, using “foam shampoo technology.” Ads showed housewives smiling as they pushed the bulky device around the living room like a fashion statement. In reality, it left damp spots that took days to dry and smelled faintly of soap for weeks.
Some even leaked, creating small bubble patches across the floor that kids loved but parents dreaded. It sounded space-age but was notoriously impractical, especially for homes with thick shag rugs. Yet somehow, it became a small sensation before being quietly discontinued. It’s one of those inventions that perfectly captures the ’70s obsession with making chores look futuristic, even if it didn’t work.
3. Spray-On Furniture Polish with Glitter
Yes, glitter. The ’70s were all about sparkle, and someone decided even your dining table should shine. Spray-On Furniture Polish with Glitter came in gold and silver, promising to “add glam to your gleam.” The ads made it sound like a disco ball for your wood furniture.
Unfortunately, the reality was more of a sticky mess that left residue on everything, from coasters to elbows. Families quickly discovered it didn’t actually polish—it just coated things in sparkly film. Many regretted using it after realizing their couches were permanently twinkling. It’s one of those products that could only have made sense in a decade that thought shag carpeting was a good idea.
4. The Self-Waxing Mop
Imagine a mop that waxed your floors for you while you cleaned. The Self-Waxing Mop promised to do just that, thanks to a refillable chamber that squirted wax as you swiped. It sounded brilliant in theory, but the results were streaky and slippery. People either ended up with half-waxed patches or dangerously slick floors.
Still, the company behind it sold millions by promoting it as “modern cleaning for modern living.” Some users swore by it, saying it cut cleaning time in half, while others nearly broke a hip. It fell out of favor quickly once people realized traditional waxing was safer—and less hazardous to guests. Today, collectors of vintage gadgets still hunt for them just for the novelty factor.
5. Scented Garbage Bags
Long before Febreze, there were ’70s scented garbage bags. They came in pastel colors and floral fragrances like “Morning Meadow” and “Citrus Delight.” The idea was to make your trash smell pleasant even on the hottest summer days. Unfortunately, combining rotting food with fake rose perfume didn’t exactly create the desired effect.
The smell was so strong that it often overpowered the entire kitchen. Some people even complained of headaches from the artificial scent. Still, it was part of the decade’s obsession with making every household item look and smell “fresh.” It didn’t work, but it did make taking out the trash slightly more entertaining.
6. The Static Zapper Wand
This was marketed as a miracle device to remove static from curtains, rugs, and clothing. The Static Zapper Wand looked like a small metal baton that supposedly neutralized static with a single swipe. It ran on batteries and lit up when it “worked,” which felt very high-tech at the time.
The problem? It didn’t actually do much except buzz faintly and occasionally shock the user. Still, people loved the idea of conquering static once and for all, especially in homes filled with synthetic fabrics. It eventually became one of those gadgets you’d find forgotten in a junk drawer. Today, it’s a charming reminder of the ’70s love affair with anything “electronic.”
7. Disposable Toilet Brush Heads
The ’70s were all about convenience, and disposable toilet brush heads were the next logical step. You could pop on a fresh scrubber for each cleaning and toss it when you were done. The concept was praised as hygienic and modern, sparing homeowners from “dirty brush buildup.”
Unfortunately, they were made of flimsy plastic and tended to detach mid-scrub, floating around like unwelcome surprises. Refills were expensive, and most people went back to traditional brushes within months. Still, it reflected the decade’s determination to turn every chore into a disposable experience. Today, a few modern versions exist—but the original remains peak ’70s ingenuity.
8. The Wall-Mounted Vacuum Port
Before central vacuums became practical, some homes had these strange wall-mounted “vacuum ports.” You’d plug a hose into the wall, and it would supposedly whisk dirt away through hidden tubes. It sounded like something out of The Jetsons.
In reality, it was loud, inconsistent, and prone to clogging with anything larger than a crumb. Many homeowners found the installation more trouble than it was worth. Still, it was considered ultra-modern and a selling point in some new homes. For many, it became just another mysterious wall outlet that nobody dared touch again.
9. The Automatic Dusting Fan
This strange ceiling fan promised to clean your room while it cooled it. Each blade had removable pads that supposedly attracted dust as it spun. Ads claimed it “circulated clean air” and reduced household allergens. It looked sleek but required constant replacement pads and maintenance.
Within months, most users realized it did the opposite—flinging dust everywhere. The idea was clever, but physics didn’t cooperate. Still, it’s the kind of bizarre home innovation that could only have emerged during the space-age craze of the ’70s. Today, collectors love finding these oddities for retro décor.
10. The Soap Cartridge Sponge
A sponge with soap preloaded inside sounded like a lazy cleaner’s dream. The Soap Cartridge Sponge came with a refillable handle that dispensed detergent at the press of a button. It promised “no more messy bottles or soggy counters.”
Of course, it leaked constantly, and most of the soap ended up on the floor instead of the dishes. The plastic handle often cracked, too, leaving users holding a dripping mess. Still, people loved the novelty and the idea of pushing a button instead of squeezing a bottle. It was one more example of the ’70s’ endless quest to automate simple chores.
11. The Fabric Softener Bubble Machine
In an era obsessed with fresh laundry scents, this oddball invention took things too far. The Fabric Softener Bubble Machine released perfumed bubbles that “softened clothes as they dried.” Users were told to hang clothes nearby so the bubbles could land on them.
It looked whimsical but didn’t actually soften much of anything. Clothes ended up sticky, and entire rooms smelled like detergent. Some people even used it as a party decoration instead of a cleaning tool. It’s one of those products that proves marketing sometimes mattered more than results.
12. The Oven Grease Eliminator Wand
This electric wand claimed to “melt away grease with the power of heat.” It looked like a curling iron but was meant for ovens. You’d run it along baked-on grime, and the heat would supposedly loosen it instantly.
The reality was that it took ages to warm up and left burnt spots on metal surfaces. People quickly realized that regular oven cleaner worked faster and cheaper. Still, it sold well for a few years thanks to flashy TV ads showing spotless ovens in seconds. It’s a perfect example of how ’70s technology could make cleaning seem magical, even when it wasn’t.
13. Citrus Spray Wipes
Before wet wipes became common, the ’70s introduced Citrus Spray Wipes—a paper towel roll stored in a spray can. You’d press a button, and out popped a citrus-scented damp sheet. It was supposed to make cleaning quick and easy.
Unfortunately, they dried out almost immediately once opened, and the scent was overpowering. Some even leaked, leaving sticky orange residue on countertops. Still, it felt revolutionary at the time and paved the way for modern disinfecting wipes. The packaging alone screams ’70s innovation meets marketing gimmickry.
14. The Floor Polishing Slippers
Why mop when you can shuffle? The Floor Polishing Slippers turned everyday walking into housework. You’d strap microfiber pads to your feet and glide around while dusting and polishing. Ads showed smiling families dancing across shiny linoleum.
In practice, they were a tripping hazard and often just smeared dirt around. Still, some people swore by them as a fun way to clean. They’ve even made a comeback in novelty form today. But the original ’70s version—complete with disco colors—was peak household absurdity.
15. The Window Cleaning Helmet
Perhaps the strangest of them all, the Window Cleaning Helmet looked like something from a sci-fi film. It had built-in spray nozzles and a squeegee attachment that let you “lean and clean” without using your hands. You’d pump cleaning fluid through a hose that connected to a backpack tank.
The idea was to make window washing faster, but it mostly left users soaked. The helmet fogged up easily, and the contraption was so heavy it caused neck pain. It’s hard to believe anyone thought this was a good idea—but then again, it was the ’70s. Nothing was too strange for the decade of avocado appliances and orange shag rugs.
